


Spring Fever

by SaltyDesert



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: 1950s, Alfred may or may not have been slipped LSD, Aliens, Blink and you'll miss it reference to MKUltra, Cold War, Definitely ain't an excuse for Alfred to oogle over Ivan, Hint of nonconsensual drug use, It's a break from the usual bullshit he's dealing with in Russia, Ivan is amused, M/M, Mental Instability, Paranoia, Reference to Sputnik, RusAme Discord April Event, Space Race, Spying, Where Matt is dragged along by Al on a totally completely super serious spy mission, matt is so done
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:15:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,124
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23852923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SaltyDesert/pseuds/SaltyDesert
Summary: “God, just- look at that commie go.”Alfred bit his lip, fingers curling over the binoculars he had stuck to his face.Matthew sighed. He wanted to be anywhere else but here.Crouching in Russia’s bushes with his brother on a ‘super secret spy mission’.===In the spring of 1958, Matthew comes across a horrifying revelation.
Relationships: America/Russia (Hetalia)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 63





	Spring Fever

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this mess in one go with no beta. Historical accuracy? Grammar? I hardly knew ye. Read at your own peril.

“God, just- look at that commie _go_.”

Alfred bit his lip, fingers curling over the binoculars he had stuck to his face.

Matthew sighed. 

He wanted to be anywhere else but here. It didn’t matter where. A cabin in the woods. A muddy trench filled with filth and disease. A world meeting. Even England’s hellhole of a kitchen would have been preferable to this.

Crouching in Russia’s bushes with his brother on a ‘super secret spy mission’.

Alfred had all but kicked down the door when he barged into his house and dragged him off to an airport. At three in the morning.

That was ten hours ago.

Ten hours of listening to Alfred and his rambling.

“Mm, yep, he’s swallowing that whole thing down like a fish. Damn dirty red. Bet he lives on nothing but vodka.”

Matthew gave his brother a look. Alfred seemed like he was fully engrossed in whatever it was that he was staring at. To be frank, he didn’t see much strategic importance in skulking around Russia’s yard in the middle of the night, but there was no point telling Alfred that. Matthew tried. All he got in return for it was an agonizing rant on how the communists were ‘poisoning’ the water supply on the plane ride over.

Yes.

Ever since Sputnik had gone and launched off, Alfred’s brand of insanity reached an all time high. At the beginning of the decade Matthew had been disturbed, but now it was just getting _old_.

“Alfred.”

“Yeah, you think you’re so slick, huh? Sitting there on your ass with that scarf of yours. What’re ya hiding under there-”

_“Alfred.”_

“-you godless commie, you expect me to believe that you’re just muscle? Muscle and skin and bone, all bundled up nice. You never let any skin show, do ya? Why is that? Got any weapons we don’t know about? Secret alien tech? That’s why you got to space, ain’t it? You’re in bed with the Martians!”

“Alfred!” Matthew hissed under his breath. “Are you trying to get us caught? You’re being way too loud- gah!”

“Mattie!” Alfred’s hands gripped onto his shoulders, binoculars tossed aside and forgotten. His eyes were blown out. “You see it too, right?”

“I- what?”

“The Martians!”

Matthew blinked. This was getting weirder by the minute. “Um. No?”

“Oh, come on, don’t play coy, I know you see ‘em. Their ship is floating right by the Russkie’s house!” Alfred yanked his northern sibling close. “You don’t have to worry about any ET’s listening in on your brain waves, okay Mattie? Tony’s got us covered. He told me about the Martians. They were gonna abduct ya for their mind control experiments, but the hero won’t let the commies get cha!”

His brother flashed him a sunny smile and gave him a thumbs up. 

Matthew leaned back as far as he could go.

It was official. Alfred had finally gone off the deep end. The radiation went and seeped into his brains, and Matthew was stuck here with him in the heart of the Soviet Union, at _Russia’s house_. This was a disaster.

“We’re gonna catch the bastards in the act, Mattie. The goddamn Communist bastard can sell out to the alien invaders all he wants, but if he-” Alfred’s voice hitched. “-if he thinks he can just probe deep in my lands with his red spies, he’s got another thing coming! Two can play at that game. Ha. Now _we’re_ the ones probing in his shit. See how he likes it.” Alfred’s tongue peeked out from his lips. He wasn’t even looking at Matthew anymore.

He snatched up the binoculars, twisted around in the bushes, and looked back at the house. “I’ve got the element of surprise this time. Gonna catch Russia with his pants down, right when he least expects it- hey where’d he go?”

Suddenly, a heavy aura fell over the twins.

“Silly Amerika! You look in wrong place! I am behind you!”

That voice. That high pitched, menacing voice.

Russia found them.

Matthew squeezed his eyes shut. This was great. Just great. Exactly what he needed. The situation had gone from bad to worse. Knowing his brother, he’d get in a fight with the slavic nation any moment now, and they’d get thrown in a cell for espionage. Perfect.

Only… that isn’t what happened.

No. Something far more horrific occurred.

Alfred’s mood, once the very essence of manic paranoia, did a complete 180. The whiplash was enough to shock Matthew into silence.

“Iv-Russia!” Lightning fast, the American stood up from the bushes, uncaring of the twigs poking out of his hair. “There you are!” He cheered, skipping over towards the very enemy he was spying on.

“Da! You are very slow! Adorable. It is a wonder how swine like you could even make it here without blowing cover, no? I am impressed by your stupidity.”

“Oh, you flatter me too much. Wasn’t too hard. Security ain’t what it used to be in this berg.” 

“That was not a compliment, you pigdog. Your obliviousness is so very cute. Easy to crush.”

Russia simpered. Alfred blushed.  
  
His brother was _blushing_ .  
  
Bile rose up in Matthew’s throat. There was an absolutely stupid expression on Alfred’s face. An expression that Matthew, with a stark realization, had seen before. Eighty-six years ago. Matthew remembered it like it was yesterday.

It was in the winter of 1871 when Matthew visited New York for the first time since his brother’s civil war. The thick, suffocating tension that had so permeated the air was now replaced by a wild sort of excitement. Crowds were lining the streets, all wanting to take a look at the Russian duke touring their country. Children were singing, people were dancing, and all the girls swooned over the handsome noble, trying to catch his fancy.

Alfred was right there along with them, giggling and going frothy at the mouth. He grabbed onto Matthew, shrieking _“Look at him, look at him, I love him so much, he’s so handsome!”_

At the time, Matthew just thought Alfred had gotten caught up in the fever pitch of his people’s excitement. But now…

Now, from the moony eyed looks Alfred kept shooting at Russia, Matthew knew it wasn’t the duke that Alfred was getting so flustered over.

It was Ivan.

Even now, at the very heights of their rivalry, the Russian nation brought out a spring fever in his brother that couldn’t be ignored.

Matthew got up on his feet, took a step back, and he walked away. Alfred and Ivan, having gotten deep into yet another spat, hardly noticed him.

At times like these, Matthew _really_ appreciated his invisible nature.

He was too jet lagged to deal with this tonight.

**Author's Note:**

> \- Sputnik 1 was launched from the Soviet Union on October 4th, 1957. It was the first foray humanity ever made into space, and was a huge achievement, but at the time it made the Americans all kinds of paranoid. At the time the USSR was also going through a bit of a power struggle after the death of Stalin (Khrushchev only just came into power in March 1958, de-Stalinization has only been going on for the past two years), so there were concerns over that, too.
> 
> \- MKUltra was a program carried out by the CIA from 1953-73, with the main goal being mind control. Really they just drugged the crap out of people with LSD. Not much mention of it here, but let's just say the 'aliens' Alfred speaks of aren't exactly real. He's tripping balls.
> 
> \- Grand Duke Alexei took a tour of the United States in 1872. The depiction of the event isn't entirely accurate, but America went crazy over it. Imagine the craziest fangirl to ever exist, the most insane celebrity cults alive, and that was America's reception to the duke in the 70s. Wild time.
> 
> Not everything here is accurate. I suck at history. If you see any discrepancies, don't be afraid to let me know.


End file.
